The Two Griefs (2 Cor 7)

Most people know, or have at least heard of, C.S. Lewis' book The Four Loves.  The titular loves are rooted in the four different Greek words for love: αγαπη (agape), ερως (eros), φιλια (philia), and στοργη (storge).  A lesser-known Greek distinction is one made by Paul: grief κατα θεον (according to God) and grief του κοσμου (of the world).  The relevant passage is this:

"As it is, I rejoice, not because you were grieved, but because you were grieved into repenting; for you felt a godly grief, so that you suffered no loss through us.  For godly grief produces a repentance that leads to salvation and brings no regret, but worldly grief produces death.  For see what earnestness this godly grief has produced in you, what eagerness to clear yourselves, what indignation, what alarm, what longing, what zeal, what punishment!  At every point you have proved yourselves guiltless in the matter" (2 Cor 7:9-11).

Grief κατα θεον ("godly grief") leads to repentance, while grief του κοσμου ("worldly grief") leads to suffering and death.  I see a connection to the psychological ideas of appropriate and inappropriate guilt: the former is legitimate guilt due to wrongdoing, guilt that leads to change (sort of like "constructive criticism"), while the latter is guilt that derives from mistakes or the imposition of another's discontent (sort of like "nagging" or "guilt trips").  Though psychology discusses this, Paul discussed it first: he rejoices over godly grief because it leads to repentance without regret, while worldly grief leads to suffering, regret, and death.  (In one Greek text I have, 2 Cor 7:10 reads that worldly grief "births" or "begets" death (γεννα θανατον).) 

I have always had difficulty with this distinction.  Worldly grief (or inappropriate guilt) is something I have always been plagued with, though I have worked on lessening its power.  Worldly grief paralyzes him who suffers it, leading not to repentance and change, but to depression and defeatism.  One feels that he is the scum of the earth, and there is absolutely nothing he can do to change it.  Godly grief, on the other hand, pains the sufferer, but it also pushes him to strive for godliness.  Godly grief does not tell a man that he cannot change, but that he must change.  This is what the main point I found in this passage: we should rejoice over the grief and guilt that leads to our repentance and continual conversion, while we should fight off that which destroys all of our will to change.

When grief leads to our conversion, let us not mourn the pain, but rejoice over the result: our θεοσις.